College Football Fans Make Asses of Themselves on Internet to Win Game Tickets
|University of Missouri fans. In case you couldn't tell.|
Now Hershey's has decided to isolate the idiots and get them to post videos on its website to compete for the dubious honor of College Football's Biggest Fan. Every week, we, the public, can vote in the Hershey's Big Fan contest. Then there will be a big face-off and the grand prize winner will get four tickets to the 2010 college football game of their choice, plus a tailgate sponsored by Hershey's. (Quick, which beer goes best with chocolate and comes in a keg?)
In the lead this week appears to be Jumpin' Jerry, a tailgater from the University of Louisville whose special fan-talent is shouting "Yeah!" a lot and spelling out C-A-R-D-S with his arms. (His spelling ain't got nothing on the O-H-I-O arm-waving folks at Ohio State. There's a reason St. Louis Cardinals fans don't spell at Busch Stadium, which Jerry makes abundantly clear: You can't tell what the hell he's supposed to be spelling.)
Clearly, this fool must be stopped.
The Hot Girl:
Go. Vote. Topple Jumpin' Jerry. Lord knows, he deserves to be toppled.
If this isn't motivation enough, please note that this week's top five is heavily dominated by University of Texas fans and they, too, deserve to be toppled. Hook' em horns? Really?
(Note: The author's undergraduate institution has a well-deserved reputation for futility in football and basketball and just about every other sport except women's fencing and lacrosse, which doesn't get you much respect in Big Fan circles and may have contributed to some feelings of bitterness toward college football and its fans.)