10 Possible Sources of Illegal Drugs Found in Adrienne Martin
|And we're not talking about caffeine...|
2. She thought she was snorting harmless bath salts.
3. Keith Hernandez dropped by to say hello; kilo fell out of his back pocket.*
4. Cocaine and oxycodone were original ingredients in Anheuser-Busch's failed alcoholic energy drink, B to the E.
5. Ultra-rich people naturally secrete cocaine from their pores when the market passes 10,000.
6. Washington Avenue did it. All coke comes from Washington Avenue.
8. They were engaging in a little bedroom roleplaying. Auggie was playing Red Auerbach. Adrienne was Len Bias being selected first in the NBA draft.
9. An obliging Dr. Feelgood.
10. The online pharmacy PartyLikeBeerBaron.com.
*Incidentally, the Baseball Writers Association of America would like to note that Adrienne Martin is still eligible for Cooperstown, as no steroids were found in her system.