Poll: Would You Pork this Pig to Escape a DUI?

timothy jones.jpg
Timothy Jones: Hot or not?
We all know that a drunk driving charge can be an enormous pain in the ass, costing thousands of dollars in legal fees and the temporary loss of your driver's licensing.

But is it really worse than having unwanted sex with this guy?

Yesterday St. Louis County prosecutors charged 48-year-old Timothy Jones with acceding to corruption by a public servant. As the Post-Dispatch details, Jones was working as a Country Club Hills police officer last November when he pulled over a 24-year-old woman on Interstate 70 for suspicion of drunk driving. After the woman performed a field sobriety test, Jones allegedly propositioned her with the offer: Get a DUI or let me have sex with you.

The two then went to the woman's home where they engaged in several sexual acts, according to court documents. Jones' superiors found out about the incident when other officers found the woman's cell phone in Jones' patrol car and used it call her mom, who relayed what had happened to her daughter. Jones remained employed with the department until a few months ago, pending an internal investigation.

So, that's the story. But it still doesn't answer the bigger question: Ladies (or men) would you have sex with Jones to get out of a DUI?

Cast your vote below or use the comment section to tell us what it would take on Jones' part or yours to prostitute yourself out of trouble.

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12 comments
Elise W.
Elise W.

He would have to have all of the nether regions shaved clean including his crack.   Only then would I even think about it.  

hotdogwaffles
hotdogwaffles

why didn't he just ask her to finger his butthole? I mean sheesh

Hessdean
Hessdean

i wouldn't even let me ex wife have sex with him ewwwwwwwwwww

Ron Finger
Ron Finger

What does this girl look like? She might have gotten off easy?

Gill
Gill

Well, did he come or what?

KITTY
KITTY

By the way, Jones' nickname is Petunia Marie.

KITTY
KITTY

Yes, Chad, he really is a fucking UGLY pig. But, you should write a column on how many guys who have fucked  nasty ugle pigs they met in bars after dowing several drinks. Remember the old adage: The difference between a fox and a pig is six beers!

John
John

you are a fat bastard

BoulevardHeights
BoulevardHeights

This guy actually tried to borrow a cashmere sweater from me once.  I said, "No! I don't want you stretchin' out the neck-hole!", and gave him a cheap, giveaway Metlife windbreaker.

Elise W.
Elise W.

Thanks for my laugh of the day!!!!  You are too funny!!  :)

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