An Open Letter to Missouri Rep. Rory Ellinger, Re: Missouri State Dog

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Kholood Eid
Isn't this the sort of face that should represent Missouri?
Dear Representative Ellinger,

First of all, congratulations on your victory in last week's primary! Yes, yes, we know you ran unopposed -- and will run unopposed again in November -- but a lot of people came out to vote for you and only you, which must be a real self-esteem booster. We're very happy that we'll have you as our state rep for another two years.

The election also gave us a chance to revisit your official Missouri House biography -- your civil rights record is pretty damned impressive, we must say. However, we couldn't help but notice that you neglected to include your feelings about pets, notably whether you are a dog person or a cat person or a bird person. (If you are, we, too, are sad about the untimely folding of Bird Talk magazine, a true loss to our noble profession.)

Whichever pet you favor -- or even if you favor none at all because you suffer from allergies (and, again, we sympathize) -- we hope, as a committed public servant, you recognize that Missouri has a serious need for a state dog. We already, of course, have a State Historical Dog in Jim the Wonder Dog, who once lived in Marshall and achieved national fame for his ability to predict Kentucky Derby winners. But there are so many non-historical dogs that deserve recognition, too! And it's pretty embarrassing that lesser states like Wisconsin have state dogs and we do not. After all, we're the headquarters of Purina!

If you are wondering, with the enormous variety of dogs in the world, how you could ever possibly choose, don't fret! Daily RFT took the liberty a couple of weeks ago of narrowing the field down to five breeds and asking our readers to vote. It's true our voting pool was not as large as the one that selected you (another self-esteem booster, right?), but of the 86 who voted, a full 43.02 percent chose the mutt.
Why the mutt, you may ask?


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