Patrons of East-Side Booby-Bars: Don't Try to Take I-64 Home This Weekend

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You can go to the East Side via the Poplar Street Bridge, but you can't come back that way
Happy Friday! 

Before you get pants-pooping drunk and wind up on "The IL Side" for some adult entertainment, know two key facts:

1) You can never unsee what you saw in the bathroom last time; and

2) This time, you cannot come back home across the Poplar Street Bridge on I-64 for the entire weekend; it'll be closed.

Here what Missouri Department of Transportation (MoDOT) says:

All lanes on westbound Interstate 64 from the Poplar Street Bridge to 21st Street will close starting at 10 a.m., Friday. All westbound lanes will reopen by 5 a.m., Monday.
The more urgent question: Can you still travel east across the bridge (and into the loving, dollar-eating embrace of Sapphire or whatever her stage-name is)? Yes, sayeth MoDOT:
One eastbound lane will be open during the weekend work.
Why are they doing all this construction, when all you're trying to do is be less alone?

MoDOT has good reasons:
The bridge was opened to traffic in November 1967 and is over 43 years old. The double deck needs to be rehabilitated to ensure a longer lifespan. The expansion joints in between the bridge decks also need to be replaced because they are in poor condition due to age.
Wait - are we talking about the strippers again?

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