5 New Year's Resolutions for St. Louis

Categories: Holidays

stl.jpg
Northfielder via flickr
OK, St. Louis. In 2014, let's be nicer to transplants and dogs, agreed?
Happy New Year! As we ring in 2014, let's all take a moment to reflect on how we can make it even better than 2013.

We have a few ideas for St. Louis' 2014 New Year's resolutions. Here are five of our favorites:

1. Get Jeff Mizanskey out of jail.

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Kholood Eid
Jeff Mizanskey has served twenty years of a life sentence without possibility of parole for three non-violent marijuana-related offenses. If he had murdered or raped or stolen, he would be a free man by now. Mizanskey's family and supporters are asking Governor Jay Nixon for clemency, and even the epitomic voice of St. Louis Bill McClellan says he deserves to go free. Give this man his life (and his joint) back.

2. No more horrific animal abuse.

trooper.jpg
Facebook
We can't stand it anymore. We're done with people who burn their dogs, drag them behind cars and otherwise abuse the shit out of them. We're really done with people who hoard dozens of animals at a time over and over. Mostly, we're sick of secretly crying over animal-abuse stories and hoping our coworkers don't notice. Just stop, St. Louis. Be nice to animals in 2014.

Continue reading for three more New Year's resolutions.


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22 comments
al_fannell
al_fannell

Number 4! BRING A PRO SOCCER TEAM WHETHER IT'S THE NASL, USL PRO LEAGUE OR MAJOR LEAGUE SOCCER TO ST.LOUIS

Travis Gillig
Travis Gillig

Really get a guy outta jail. Fuck that. There's more to it than. Pot charge

Epic Coffeetime
Epic Coffeetime

We resolve to do more Epic things for more Epic people. Thanks for a great 2013 RFT! Get your writing fingers ready!

Ashley Hughes
Ashley Hughes

The RFT's resolution should be to not post the same stories over and over.

perock
perock topcommenter

How about work on mending race relationships, extending the metro to cover more of the counties, work on revitalizing parts of the city, and focus on getting more things for youth and young adults to do so they have more choices than violence and drugs to turn to... maybe setting up more student friendly places, i mean we have 3 universities and barely anything good for students to do. 

Couch Pig
Couch Pig

my resolution is a better zip code

Tim Howell
Tim Howell

Being a stl transplant has been horrible. St louisans are extremely cliqish.

Stephen Martin
Stephen Martin

I do not. Resolutions do not need a specific date. Just a drive to archive them.

JamesMadison
JamesMadison topcommenter

The top new year's resolution is to stop making stupid resolutions!


If lord and master Bill McClellan says so, thy will be done! Sorry. At the time of that dude's arrest, laws were in place. He committed the crime knowing those laws and punishments. Should every convict get a "do over" or a feeble attempt at moral equivalence? Convict#2 only kill two people and convict #3 killed four, shouldn't convict #2 serve half the time of convict #3?

And Imo pizza sucks. Always has and always will.

You propose concerts at the arch when they are under major reconstruction? Well done! No research, just sit back and dream.

Sarah Anne
Sarah Anne

Oh one more thing lets get St. Louis off these worst of lists! Worst place to drive a silver car on a one way street? Go figure St. Louis is #2 on the list and Detroit is #1.

Sarah Anne
Sarah Anne

Go cubs and go blues. A compromise is in order.

Sarah Anne
Sarah Anne

Amen to the eradication of animal abuse and neglect and being more welcoming to transplants like me :)

Kelly Lane VanBeek
Kelly Lane VanBeek

And please don't expect transplants to jump on your Cardinal bandwagon. Would you become a Braves fan if you moved to my home town of Atlanta? Probably not. So don't expect me to be rooting for any red feathered thing. Go Braves!

Samuel Price
Samuel Price

How bout let's be nicer to homeless kids? They're the ones who matter most.

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