Two Proud St. Louis Perverts Explain The Romance Of A Kinky Valentines Day

Categories: Holidays

Flickr/Quinn Dombrowski
3. Share Your Kinky Commitment

Lest any stodgy moralists presume that BDSM aficionados have abandoned all manner of traditional values, Holliday points out that Valentines Day would make a great opportunity for a collaring ceremony.

"Collaring ceremonies that are kind of like a wedding. Instead of receiving a ring, they receive a collar."

However, for an idea considerably less intense, Holliday recommends lovers avail themselves of Nuru gel -- an odorless, tasteless semi-goopy lube that partners can spread on each other's bodies. The result is slippery-fun sex that is just flipping terrific, she says. It's also "perfect for vanilla couples and kinkster orgies."

But gel or no gel, nobody has it easier on Valentines Day than those in dominant/submissive relationships. In such a BDSM arraignment, explains Wraith, both partners should already be comfortable sharing their romance through "gestures" based in control or servitude.

"For a lot of vanilla or monogamous couples, they wait for Valentines Day or their anniversary to bring any sort of stagecraft to their relationship. Whereas kinky people, we do that all time," Wraith says.

"If you're the dom," he continues, "you might want to design a special scene to put your submissive through on Valentines Day. If you're a 'service submissive,' you might come up with a very special service ritual for your dom."

See also: St. Louis Authors Share Their Kinks in Anthology of Local Erotica

For non-kinky couples, Valentines Day could be an opportunity building that experience-designing muscle, says Wraith. Pick up an erotic novel (like, say, the locally produced Show Me: Erotic Stories From the Gateway to the West) and read it aloud your partner before having some amazing-and-slippery Nuru sex.

"There's a lot of things that are sort of universal between vanilla couples and kinky couples," offers Wraith. "It's just kinky couples enjoy doing them on more sexually extreme level."

Follow Danny Wicentowski on Twitter at @D_Towski. E-mail the author at

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