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Two Proud St. Louis Perverts Explain The Romance Of A Kinky Valentines Day

Categories: Holidays

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Flickr/Quinn Dombrowski
3. Share Your Kinky Commitment

Lest any stodgy moralists presume that BDSM aficionados have abandoned all manner of traditional values, Holliday points out that Valentines Day would make a great opportunity for a collaring ceremony.

"Collaring ceremonies that are kind of like a wedding. Instead of receiving a ring, they receive a collar."

However, for an idea considerably less intense, Holliday recommends lovers avail themselves of Nuru gel -- an odorless, tasteless semi-goopy lube that partners can spread on each other's bodies. The result is slippery-fun sex that is just flipping terrific, she says. It's also "perfect for vanilla couples and kinkster orgies."

But gel or no gel, nobody has it easier on Valentines Day than those in dominant/submissive relationships. In such a BDSM arraignment, explains Wraith, both partners should already be comfortable sharing their romance through "gestures" based in control or servitude.

"For a lot of vanilla or monogamous couples, they wait for Valentines Day or their anniversary to bring any sort of stagecraft to their relationship. Whereas kinky people, we do that all time," Wraith says.

"If you're the dom," he continues, "you might want to design a special scene to put your submissive through on Valentines Day. If you're a 'service submissive,' you might come up with a very special service ritual for your dom."

See also: St. Louis Authors Share Their Kinks in Anthology of Local Erotica

For non-kinky couples, Valentines Day could be an opportunity building that experience-designing muscle, says Wraith. Pick up an erotic novel (like, say, the locally produced Show Me: Erotic Stories From the Gateway to the West) and read it aloud your partner before having some amazing-and-slippery Nuru sex.

"There's a lot of things that are sort of universal between vanilla couples and kinky couples," offers Wraith. "It's just kinky couples enjoy doing them on more sexually extreme level."

Follow Danny Wicentowski on Twitter at @D_Towski. E-mail the author at Danny.Wicentowski@RiverfrontTimes.com

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24 comments
Scott Tyler
Scott Tyler

Brilliant, I can't wait to tell my wife she gets to be my foot stool for Valentine's Day.

lacey52
lacey52

it's nice to know that even a city in the bible belt can have places for alternative people to go, meet, and explore their lifestyle away from the "norms" out there.  it's nice to know people are so close minded that they can't even be ok with someone elses lifestyle. we don't push it on you so keep your "normal" views to your self. they are everywhere anyway so, why can't ours be out there without getting degraded?

Andrew William
Andrew William

So judgemental and puritanical on the comments. Different strokes ;)

Jeffrey Young
Jeffrey Young

If these sex lives were kept private then let them do it without comment. But, when you open it up to the public then you also open it up tp comment. Personally I believe that these people are not only damaged, but that these actions actually exacerbate that damage both in themselves and their partners not all that differently than in many other addictions.

Ash Hinkle
Ash Hinkle

Haha so much butt hurt over other peoples sex lives...jeez

Lynn Ferguson
Lynn Ferguson

call it what it is. a perversion. a sicknedss.

Kristy Küster
Kristy Küster

They just had to name it something like 50 Shade of St. Louis... then it wouldn't seem so "wrong" to at least some of the female crowd. To each their own people but everyone has to judge bc it's not their way of life. Personally I'd prefer to keep it mono but hey if a guy can be that attentive & loving to 2+ women, and they know & are ok with it, then hats off to him bc there are plenty of guys who can't even manage to do that with 1 gal.

Tammy Pendino
Tammy Pendino

To me people that do these perverted practices of sex were either neglected or abused by their parents. Being perverted is the only outlet they have to compensated for all the lack of attention that society didn't give them as teens. Monogamy to me shows that you have honor and respect for your mate its a sign of true love. Public sexual deviance with multiple partners should be kept behind doors. Why RFT had to go and write this article and remind me Once again that my fair city has weirdos lurking about is not really news. News means tell something "new". Fuck!

Deb Woods
Deb Woods

A "pervert" is a pedophile. Someone who indulges in LEGAL sexual kinks should not be stigmatized this way.

Steve Mincer
Steve Mincer

sounds like a club stefan on snl would go to. they have a midget, a waffle bar, a clown...

Alex Peck
Alex Peck

Thanks RFT,I need a reminder once in awhile of why I left St.louis years ago!

D_Towski
D_Towski

@piecesofjade I saw the blog post and I just couldn't help wanting to include it in some way.. :)

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