Winter Olympics: Five Absurd St. Louis "Sports" We'd Rather Watch Than Curling

Categories: Lists, Sports

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We think the Winter Olympics are great. That overtime shootout when Blues forward T.J. Oshie scored a crazy between-the-knees goal to win it all for team U.S.A.? Wow. Just, wow. Instant classic.

Alas, other "sports" at the Winter Olympics are decidedly less exciting. (We're looking at you, curling, ice dancing, luge, biathlon and bobsleigh.)

If the International Olympic Committee really wants to ensure sports greatness for the 2018 winter games in Pyeongchang, South Korea, they should tap the same source that provided Sochi with Oshie -- St. Louis, that is.

Here are five somewhat fanciful suggestions for St. Louis-themed sports we'd love the Winter Olympics to adopt.

See also: 20 Reasons to Love Winter in St. Louis

1. Art Hill Skeleton

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Our biggest gripe with Winter Olympic sports like skeleton -- where the winner is determined by orderly, individual speed runs -- is that they lack tension.

The grand St. Louis tradition of sledding down Art Hill in Forest Park, however, would present a fantastic spectacle of chaos and excitement for an Olympic crowd. Just imagine: Athletes in skin-tight bodysuits hurtling down the packed hill, swerving desperately to avoid snowboarders and oncoming children -- wouldn't that be fantastic?

Style points awarded for ditching your modern sled for a folding chair -- that's what a handful of state-fair employees first used to slide down Art Hill in 1905.

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16 comments
Brewneaux Welldone
Brewneaux Welldone

It becomes clearer by the day that the folks at RFT are in their own little world. Please stop trying to drag us into it, you guys are idiots.

Philip Rock
Philip Rock

this stupid article again? people didn't like it the first time you shared it

Ryan Paluczak
Ryan Paluczak

This article would be entertaining to anyone with the sophistication of a high school freshman, but it's not for me this time.

Steve Van Booven
Steve Van Booven

lol, I like curling, it's kind of like a cold weather washers/shuffleboard game. Other than the broom sweeping, I see nothing that strange about it. For sure more of a game of skill than a sport but that's why they are called the Olympic Games not the Olympic Sports...

Ria Halcomb
Ria Halcomb

Sorry, I like curling, luge and (hide my face) ice dancing (especially since the US team won gold)! so nix the frenzied shopping before a Missouri snow event.

Deb Woods
Deb Woods

"Like aggressive sweeping" - hilarious

Dustin Estes
Dustin Estes

Much like John Shuster, this article misses the mark. Curling is awesome.

Ejrin Hodzic
Ejrin Hodzic

So should naked bike riding. If they like being exposed so much why not put it on the World stage, not just Tower Grove park!

Philip Rock
Philip Rock

i love watching curling. it's like aggressive sweeping. i feel like this is trying to be hipster but i feel like true hipsters watch curling because it's too complicated and mainstream kids just don't understand it.

Stephen Freuler
Stephen Freuler

man thats funny, what other hipster articles can you guys pull out

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