Winter Olympics: Five Absurd St. Louis "Sports" We'd Rather Watch Than Curling

Categories: Lists, Sports

See also: The 10 Dumbest "Sports" of the Summer Olympics

2. St. Louis Biathlon

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Jon Gitchoff

It's surprising just how boring the winter biathlon is to watch. Yes, it has guns, but the pace is plodding and slow.

A St. Louis biathalon would start with a bracing, polar plunge into Lake St. Louis. After finishing their laps, competitors would then locate the nearest fast-food joint and attempt five perfect Nerf gun assaults on the drive-through.

3.Winter Idiotarod

idiotarod.jpg
Jon Gitchoff
The Idiotrod is already a ridiculous competition, but adding snow and Nerf guns elevate it to Olympic-caliber ridiculousness.

This event would stay faithful to its St. Louis roots, but with one Olympic twist: Teams would still build elaborately themed, ramshackle racing carts -- but the finish line would lie on the other end of an unplowed residential street covered in black ice.

Style points awarded for competing naked, a la the World Naked Bike Ride. (We'd like to think Vladimir Putin would enjoy the naked Winter Idiotarod. We know he's a fan of partial nudity.)


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