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Ballpark Village: 10 People Following the Dress Code Who Should Get Kicked Out Anyway

shocker.jpg
Photos by Steve Truesdell
No one wants to see this. Go home.
Ballpark Village is finally here! It's real, it's happening, and you can even wear a jersey most of the time.

Daily RFT realizes we've been a little rough on Ballpark Village's late-night dress code lately. So this story isn't about the people who would get kicked out for wearing the wrong thing. It's about the people who should get kicked out for so many other reasons.

See also: Ballpark Village: Here's What Happens When You Violate Our Dress Code

Here are the ten people who are following the dress code but still need to leave:

1. The Shocker Bros

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See that blonde lady on the left giving these guys serious side-eye? That's about how we feel. It's late, kids, time to go home.

2. The Happiest Blues Fans Ever

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Wearing a hockey jersey is only allowed at seven Ballpark Village restaurants and bars with dress codes if it's on a game day. And since the St. Louis Blues whooped the Minnesota Wild Thursday night, this jersey is doubly allowed. We think these guys should go find a Blues bar and be with their own people. We're thinking south county?

3. The Juggler

juggler.jpg
Wearing a hat is only prohibited on the second floor of the Budweiser Brew House, which has three total floors. But it's hard to be impressed by juggling when a lady in assless chaps is riding the mechanical bull at the PBR bar. This guy should probably juggle his way back to the six-year-old's birthday party he came from.

See all the Riverfront Times' photos: Will These People Be Turned Away from Ballpark Village?

4. The Ladies' Man

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This guy just looks too fly to be partying with all these youngsters in Cardinals sweatshirts. Plus, he can't wear his sick hat on the second floor of the Budweiser Brew House, and we think the hat really makes the outfit. So go find a bar that appreciates your sartorial smarts, sir.

5. The Newly Engaged Couple

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Since these two aren't wearing jerseys, they're allowed anywhere in Ballpark Village after dark. But they look like all they really want to do is bone each other, and we support that. Go home and get busy, lovebirds.

Five more, on page two!



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155 comments
JamesMadison
JamesMadison topcommenter

Lumberjack? You probably thought Jason Motte was cool with his beard. STOP poking fun of people looks! My goodness, did you not get enough of that on the playground? Now you think your adulthood should make it your writing profession to criticize looks? Really?

Deb Woods
Deb Woods

Ok really - this is TRULY a lost opportunity. Do you realize how POSITIVE & INSPIRING these pics could have been?? "The Lumberjack" - a guy who is SO COOL with his Cardinal Red, he wears it in his beard! "The Juggler" - clearly the coolest & most talented fan at BPV! Don't we all wish we could be him?! Bet he is popular with the ladies being so good with his hands! "The Guy from IL" - We love it when IL peeps come to STL to give us their dollars! And wearing IL Proud at BPV just makes the Bi-State area seem like one big happy family! Next time - bring some friends with you, the more the merrier! "The Newbie Drinkers" - forget what you've heard about rumored high drink prices at BPV - the drinks are SO GOOD these guys had their first drinks at BPV! See what you're missing??! "The Newly Engaged Couple" - if word gets out that BPV IS THE PLACE to get engaged - the ladies will be dragging their mens here every day! Nothing like a little romantic red to go with your Cardinal Red! "The Blues Fans at BPV" - even Blues Fans know that BPV is the hip sports place to be in STL. "The Ladies Man at BPV" - so nice to see an awesome RED HAT that isn't a ballcap being worn at BPV! This guy just might start a trend. And where did he get that AWESOME shirt to match??! This guy must shop somewhere cool like Levine Hat Co - for his threads! I could go on & on! So much COOLER to be POSITIVE about STL, BPV & STL PEEPS! Why you gotta be all hating & negative, RFT?? These folks let you take their pic & you make fun of them?! You suck.

zeus_daughter2
zeus_daughter2

I believe this is the lamest piece I have ever seen in RFT.  :(  

Michelle Fiondel Heitman
Michelle Fiondel Heitman

One really has to wonder if there are, in fact, *any* journalistic qualifications required to write for the RFT. Surely St. Louis can come up with something better than this.

huckno.7
huckno.7

This piece was too catty to be enjoyable. Are 13-year-olds on the staff now?

Drew Somervell
Drew Somervell

Kristen Sommerville, you spelled your name wrong.

Drew Somervell
Drew Somervell

The author made a personal attack on a friend of mine for being a talented entertainer. Singled him out with a photo and everything.

Casey Purtle
Casey Purtle

Drew Somervell none of them that I know of.......

Timothy Halpin
Timothy Halpin

Slow news day, RFT? Spectacularly unwarranted and unfunny.

Angie Johnson Myers
Angie Johnson Myers

It is so easy to sit back and tear apart people and their appearances. I was there last night. If you want to bash anything, take a stab at the management who trained the wait staff there. Or security. Or the ill equipped bathrooms. Or the owners who think they are doing our city a favor by providing a nonstop flow of beer with a 3 hour wait for food.

Mike Dame
Mike Dame

fuck ball park village , and the uppity rich p o s that run it , .

Lanie Dattilo
Lanie Dattilo

RFT is all non funny cynicism and shitty writing. The author sounds like a high school mean girl with her sad insults. Leave the journalism to professionals.

Mark C. Rich
Mark C. Rich

I read through this a couple of times trying to see the humor intended but personal insults just aren't funny. Maybe the author is in grade school. Yeah, that's why this seems so childish.

Heather Lynn Pittman McCarthy
Heather Lynn Pittman McCarthy

BPV is a fantastic thing that had happened to downtown! Sure the dress code doesn't really make sense, but if the bars that have those strict codes aren't doing the business they expected, they will modify and change their dress code. I think that this article is terrible because it is incredibly and harshly over judging stl residents. Quit tearing down the city and those that spend $ to build it up! This blog should not be on RFT, it is not funny and cringe worthy.

Drew Somervell
Drew Somervell

Not a lot of love for Lindsey on this one. Here's where you lost me. You shit on Juggling Jeff. Have you met Jeff? He is the furthest thing from a problematic person. He exhibits more talent for his craft when he's not paying attention than you could write on your best day. He's one of best people I've known in this city. He's one of the nicest people I've ever met. For you to include him in a list of disposable people that features shocker bros. and douchebags just proves that you really should find another line of work.

Carrie Voelker
Carrie Voelker

Welp, it's about time for me to unsubscribe, RFT. Your articles (and I'm using that term very loosely) are pretty pointless, even for sheer entertainment value. There are so many interesting things going on in St. Louis--I can people watch on my own time.

nrichards4
nrichards4

I think the only person who doesn't belong at ballpark village is the author of article....

Casey Purtle
Casey Purtle

The people who think this isn't funny probably fall into one of the categories depicted.

Wes Slocum
Wes Slocum

Ballpark Village seems and looks highly overrated. I'm definitely not going to spend money somewhere that I cannot wear a hat on a second floor (dumb fucking rule) or a jersey on any other. I'll pass on the whole idea of going there. Plus Hooters will be less busy and there's still better talent there

Ashley Diane
Ashley Diane

This is the second time they've posted this article since Thursday and I still hate it. At this point I'm beginning to wonder why I even liked this page.

Brandon J. Tosie
Brandon J. Tosie

There is nothing classy about downtown St.Louis...Just Sayin'...

Bradley Fastcode
Bradley Fastcode

Another profoundly unfunny and clumsy skunker from this author.

Ray Thomas
Ray Thomas

after seeing this ASSortment of drunks and immature kids i had even less reason to come see ballpark village

M.Antoinette
M.Antoinette

What a surprise... another article where Lindsay Toler hates on the people of St. Louis! Judging  from her past articles I don't think there's anyone here she does like, so maybe she should try another city and stop using the RFT like it's her own personal burn book.

vi_sg_spike
vi_sg_spike

the maker of this is a DICK and should get fired or beat for this INSULT to of ST LOUISIANS PLUUUS today they have a party at ballpark village for the blues and even has a shuttle bus to go to the game and also dress code changed as of yesterday to allow jerseys ANY time now NOT just for games

kelleytanner0
kelleytanner0

Wow. The one about the "way too happy blues fans" really got to me. What's wrong with supporting another sport in OUR city?! There's more to St. Louis than baseball, and right now the Blues are kicking ass. Shame on you RFT.

dg1993
dg1993

I've honestly not been this disappointed in the river front times and especially in the negativity displayed here in a long time. Saint Louis is a baseball AND Hockey town, regardless of what part we came from of saint louis, most of us can all agree on one thing and that being that we live our city, dislike dress codes, love beer and love our teams. Out of all the people that were put on blast in the article, It looks like you ALL had a lot of FUN. and it should NEVER matter if you're from Illinois, supporting the blues AFTER a big win, MARRIED or with your sig. Other. , looking "too" good, or anything you belong there just as much as Lindsey Toler's horrible judgement belongs in the garbage.

This article should be taken down.

Ashley Ernst
Ashley Ernst

This is a stupid article. Really couldn't find anything better to write about?

goobeedoo
goobeedoo

They couldn't of approved this article...it's online bullying which is greatly frowned upon. Even if it's all true, you don't write a piece about it. Wth...I'd be ticked if someone slandered me.

Luke David McGowan
Luke David McGowan

This article is an embarrassment to the entire Riverfront Times organization. Terrible journalism, tasteless editing, and a complete waste of time. There are good articles on RFT, but sometimes you guys put out crap that someone wrote on their way to the office in rush hour or something...just complete garbage.

lmcflytime
lmcflytime

another epic failure from RFT...did someone just make this up while taking a dump this morning?

Molly Balkenbush
Molly Balkenbush

The scariest part about this is that some comments refer to the writer as a journalist. This is a blog post, not a news article. It's a terrible blog post but it's still a blog post. Do better Riverfront Times.

Benjamin Jost
Benjamin Jost

The dress code is ok, what is stupid is you putting these people on blast, FYI I do not know any of them.

Michael Major
Michael Major

Well done, RFT... By putting poorly conceived (and written) crap like this out so regularly, you've alienated a good portion of your readership. The businesses that support the RFT will figure out that it's nothing more than a cheap ad rag sooner or later.

caritas317
caritas317

#4 Here. I think if they are going to have a dress code it shouldn't be all the time. If they are going to have one it should be limited to Friday and Saturday nights. I heard they are also requiring people to pay their cover with a credit card. This is going to keep out a lot of poorer minorities who don't have checking accounts, seems kind of racist to me. Sadly I'm not principled enough to not go I was very impressed with ballpark village. You can tell the put a lot of money into it. It is going to create a bunch of good paying jobs as well.

jaco1175
jaco1175 topcommenter

That is what talentless cunts specialize in

jaco1175
jaco1175 topcommenter

Well at least they have given stories about the juggalos a rest for a week or so

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