I'll admit it: I thought this Cardinal team was going to be an absolute juggernaut from the very beginning. First day of spring training, I thought they would be making opposing teams cry with their overwhelming superiority.
Thus, you can imagine my feelings of discontent when this team not only failed to make anyone cry, but actually started out with a big fat ofer in the win column. In fact, not only was I discontented, I started feeling the familiar squeezing sensation I get every year when I suddenly realise the Cardinals probably aren't going to go 162-0 and have a run differential of +600. I started to panic.
"What is wrong with this team?" I thought to myself. "How can a team with Matt Holliday and Albert Pujols and Chris Carpenter and Adam Wainwright possibly be this bad?" (Ignoring, of course, the fact none of those guys have actually seen much on-field time.)
Fortunately for me and my peace of mind, these games don't count. They literally mean absolutely nothing. In fact, you could classify these games as nothing more than practice, if you wanted. And we all know how much practice matters, right? Hell, I'll let the recently-retired legend himself, Allen Iverson, tell you all about practice.