Thieving Teens Thought Grandfather's Ashes Were Cocaine, Relative Claims

Take note: This is the precise expression to wear when explaining the theft of your father's ashes.
If television and movies have taught us anything, it's that the urn of a cremated loved one is a hilarious mishap waiting to happen.

In November, the well-worn trope became reality when three teens broke into a St. Peters home and made off with the wooden box containing what remained of the homeowner's father. Thinking the powdery substance was cocaine, one of the boys tasted the mixture.

Police arrested the culprits last week, but the story didn't end there. Now -- in a development that threatens to blur the line between real life and whatever reality Keith Richards lives in -- the victim of the burglary claims that two of the teens were grandchildren of the very man whose cremains they mistook for a pile of drugs.

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Former Boy Scout Leader Created Female Alter Ego to Trick Teen Boys Into Making Sex Videos

Ian F. Burow, 25.
A former Boy Scouts of America leader who pretended to be a woman to convince minors to send him sexually explicit photos is going to prison after pleading guilty to child pornography charges.

A federal judge sentenced Ian F. Burow, a 25-year-old Columbia man and former University of Missouri student, to twenty years in prison followed by a lifetime of supervised release Tuesday, according to the Columbia Daily Tribune.

Burow pleaded guilty in February to seven counts of receiving and distributing child porn involving boys ages fourteen through seventeen. He also pleaded guilty to one count of producing child porn after transmitting images of him having sex with a fifteen-year-old victim live over the Internet using Skype.

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Violent Burglars Shoot Woman on Third Attempt to Break Into Her Home in One Day

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Facing east on the 3200 block of Taft Avenue toward Virginia Avenue, where cops eventually arrested the suspects.
The third time's the charm -- at least when it comes to catching violent criminals.

St. Louis police arrested two men suspected of trying to shoot, kick and shatter their way into a residence in the 3200 block of Taft Avenue three back-to-back times on Monday. On the third attempt, the armed burglars shot a 36-year-old woman in the shoulder before officers arrived and chased them down.

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Slots Plot: Russian Men Indicted for Cheating Casinos in St. Louis, East St. Louis

Jeff Kubina via Flickr
The men are charged with travelling to Missouri and Illinois to cheat casinos.
Four Russian men are facing federal charges for plotting to cheat at the slot machines at casinos in St. Louis and across the river.

The four men -- Murat Bliev, Yevgeniy Nazarov, Igor Lavrenov and Ivan Gudalov -- were indicted by a grand jury for conspiring to travel from Russia to at least ten casinos in Missouri, Illinois and California to employ their scam. Bliev, 36; Lavrenov, 28; and Gudalov, 32; live in Moscow, according to the U.S. Attorney's office. Nazarov, 38, is a U.S. citizen living in Miami, Florida.

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Missouri Man Busted for Producing, Requesting "Custom" Child Pornography

After pleading guilty to five felony child-pornography charges, Gary A. Dotson of Pacific has been sentenced to 24 years in prison.

An FBI and Franklin County Sheriff's Department investigation revealed Dotson, 32, traded sexual images of children online on an "almost daily basis," according to the U.S. attorney's office.

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Two Teens Shot After Gunman Targets Group of Boys

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Iowa Avenue and Lynch Street, where police found shell casings from the shooting.
St. Louis Metropolitan police are searching for the gunman who targeted a group of teenage boys Saturday evening, shooting a thirteen-year-old and a fourteen-year-old.

The six boys -- all between the ages of thirteen and sixteen -- were walking in the 2600 block of Iowa Avenue, in the Fox Park neighborhood, around 5:45 p.m. Saturday when the suspect pulled up in a black 2000s Honda four-door sedan and asked them a question, police said.

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Robber Orders Chinese Food, Stabs Delivery Driver, Steals Food, Money

dslrninja via flickr
Why can't he just pay for his Chinese food like everybody else?
St. Louis police are investigating a robbery and assault after a restaurant delivery driver was attacked in the McKinley Heights neighborhood of south St. Louis.

The victim, a 34-year-old employee at the China King on South Broadway, is in stable condition at a hospital. He was delivering food to a residence in the 1800 block of Russell Boulevard, near Gravois Avenue, after 8:30 p.m. Monday, according to police reports.

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Strip Club Customers Robbed, One Kidnapped by Masked Men with Assault Rifles

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Dollie's Playhouse.
Police are on the hunt for three men preying on one of the most vulnerable targets imaginable: men leaving east-side strip clubs.

A group of customers were leaving Dollie's Playhouse in Washington Park Tuesday when three masked men armed with assault rifles and handguns burst out of the bushes, fired into the air and announced a robbery, according to the Belleville News-Democrat.

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Armed Teens Steal Pants, Phones, Wallets; Get Tased By Cops, Bitten by K9 Unit: Police

Photos courtesy of SLMPD
Devonte Addison, 19.
St. Louis Metropolitan Police arrested four young men suspected of robbing victims of their pants, phones and wallets after police chased them by car and on foot early Wednesday morning.

A sixteen-year-old suspect was tased by police during the foot chase, and a twenty-year-old suspect was unintentionally struck by a police vehicle and bitten by a K-9 unit before police detained him, according to police reports. They were treated at a hospital for minor injuries before joining two other suspects, both nineteen-years-old, in jail.

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Mom, Son Scam Elderly Woman, Move Into Her House, Promise Animal Shelter in Her Name

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The Albin Avenue home Mark Kistler bought with the victim's money and now lives in rent-free.
A mother and son duo are banned from working in securities in Missouri after scamming an elderly woman out of more than $200,000 with bogus real estate investments and promises to operate an animal shelter in her name, according to Secretary of State Jason Kander.

Marylin H. Kistler and Mark A. Kistler of St. Louis convinced the 89-year-old victim to take out a $110,000 home equity loan, buy three properties to rehab and sell her car and stock to finance moving into a low-income, assisted-living facility, even though the woman didn't want to leave her home, according to the cease-and-desist letter from the secretary's office.

The unidentified woman first met the Kistlers when she was a medical patient of David Kistler, Marylin's husband and Mark's father, in 1986. Mark started driving the victim to appointments and running errands for her as a teenager, and Marylin was a nurse at the office.

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