11 Horror-able Jokes For Halloween Trick-Or-Treaters

Categories: Holidays

Lobo235 via Flickr
Tell a Halloween joke that will make 'em die laughing.
It's finally Halloween. Do you know what that means? Joke time!

St. Louis tradition dictates that trick-or-treaters offer a joke or riddle before getting their candy. Only St. Louis and Des Moines, Iowa, make jokes a big part of the year's spookiest holiday, which is all the more reason to prepare with a few quality zingers. After all, trick-or-treaters without jokes are at risk of getting pencils for Halloween instead of candy. Pencils. The horror!

As is our annual Riverfront Times tradition, we've compiled a list of some of our favorites. They're a scream!

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12 Last Minute St. Louis-Themed Halloween Costume Ideas

Categories: Holidays

Illustrations by Curtis Tinsley
Need a Halloween costume idea? What about one of St. Louis' 250 birthday cakes?
Happy (almost) Halloween!

If you're anything like us, you still haven't bought a costume for the spooky, boozy weekend ahead. And whether you're passing treats out to trick-or-treaters or painting the town red with friends, you'll need a costume -- even if it's something you throw together last-minute.

See also: 6 Cardinals-Themed Halloween Costume Ideas

But coming up with costume ideas is hard. That's why we've done it for you.

Inspired by current events and our own sick sense of humor, here are the Riverfront Timesbest last-minute St. Louis-themed costume ideas:

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What to Expect at This Year's St. Louis Haunted Houses: Darkness, Creepyworld and Abyss

Categories: Holidays

Photo courtesy of Larry Kirchner
A face only a mother could love.

The Darkness, one of St. Louis's most popular haunted houses, opened last Friday, and that means Larry Kirchner, co-owner and creator, hasn't slept in days.

Kirchner, along with co-creator Jim Kelly, owns three of the major haunted house attractions in the St. Louis area -- Creepyworld in Fenton, The Abyss at the Lemp Brewery downtown and The Darkness in Soulard.

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The Most Patriotic People at Fair St. Louis (PHOTOS)

Categories: Holidays

Caroline Yoo
A couple with two impressively American ball caps watches the festivities on Art Hill at Fair St. Louis 2014.
The people of St. Louis proved once again that America is the land of the free this weekend at the city's relocated Fourth of July celebration.

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9 Places to Watch Fourth of July Fireworks That Aren't Fair St. Louis

Categories: Holidays

Herkie on Flickr
Happy Fourth of July, St. Louis!
Independence Day will be a little bit different in St. Louis this year, with construction on the Gateway Arch pushing the annual Fair St. Louis into Forest Park. The change in venue hasn't dampened the three-day patriotic extravaganza: The famed VP parade starts at the Muny at 10:30 a.m. Friday, Bonnie Raitt and the Fray are performing, and fireworks will go off each night at 10 p.m.

To prepare for the parking nightmare that's sure to come, fair organizers have set up shuttles, a cab stand and a bike valet, all while encouraging St. Louisans to opt for the MetroLink as the easiest way to get into the festival.

See also: Amazing Fireworks Misfire in San Diego

But if you're looking for a fireworks display that doesn't come with it's own transportation manual, Daily RFT found a few options outside of town.

Here are nine festivals with Fourth of July fireworks this weekend:

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5 Ways St. Louis Celebrates Cinco de Mayo

Categories: Holidays

Micah Usher for the Riverfront Times
See all our Cinco de Mayo 2014 photos in the slideshow.
Happy Cinco de Mayo, St. Louis!

More than 150 years later, the anniversary of Mexico's victory over French forces at the Battle of Puebla has developed into a day-long celebration on Cherokee Street, complete with street food, face painting, concerts, wrestling, bounce houses and a mechanical bull.

Hundreds of revelers poured into Cherokee Street this weekend to celebrate Cinco de Mayo two days early. (Hey, some of us have to work on Monday.)

See all photos: Cinco de Mayo 2014 on Cherokee Street

Want to celebrate Cinco de Mayo today? Here's how St. Louis party people on Cherokee Street celebrated this weekend:

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Photos: St. Louis Gets Lucky at St. Patrick's Day Dogtown Parade

Categories: Holidays

Photos by Jon Gitchoff
Happy St. Patrick's Day!
If you got to play hooky from work Monday and party at the Hiberian's St. Patrick's Day Parade in Dogtown, then you must really have the luck of the Irish on your side.

Monday's parade celebrated all things green -- floats, beads, tutus, beer...and, after too much beer, puke. St. Patrick would be proud.

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St. Patrick's Day 2014: Your Guide to Getting Lucky This Weekend in St. Louis

Categories: Holidays

David Walthall
Ahoy! It's St. Patrick's Day!
Sure, St. Patrick's Day isn't technically until Monday, but who says we can't party now? Prep your liver for green beer and corned beef now so you're ready for the big day.

Here's our official Daily RFT guide to the best St. Louis St Patrick's Day celebration ever:

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How to Party All Week at St. Louis Mardi Gras 2014 And End Up Looking Like This

Categories: Holidays

Photos by Steve Truesdell
Mardi Gras in St. Louis: Time to party!
Laissez les bon temps rouler!

It's time to show off our French heritage, St. Louis. Mardi Gras is almost upon us!

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Two Proud St. Louis Perverts Explain The Romance Of A Kinky Valentines Day

Categories: Holidays

Flickr/Eduardo Santos
It's not dinner at a mid-priced Italian restaurant, but this is romance.
David Wraith hasn't yet made Valentines Day plans with either of his girlfriends.

Yes, he has two girlfriends, and yes, they're two serious relationships, what's known as a polyamorous arrangement. As for Wraith, a self described "free-range poly man-whore," he says this is actually his first Valentines Day-related multi-girlfriend predicament.

"I need to look at a calendar and see who's available when," he says, adding, "Google Calendar is a godsend to the poly community."

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