Real Men Eat Meat - They Just Don't Like It: The Most Homophobic Food Ads

Categories: List Mania!, Media

got-homophobia-got-milk.gif
​Gut Check was enjoying a day dozing in front of the ol' Samsung when a Klondike commercial came on and jolted us out of our daydreaming.

Was it the mere mention of this wholesome family treat that caused us to bolt upright in our Barcalounger? Sadly, no.

The ice cream bar maker and its parent company, Unilever, have evidently decided to take their ads in a new direction, the "What would you do for a Klondike bar?" jingle having worn out its welcome. So they gave it a facelift. Well, that's not quite accurate, in that "facelift" is probably too effeminate a term for this new approach. Let's just say their marketing has been "retooled."

Dubbed 5 Seconds to Glory, the new Klondike campaign is a riff on the "What would you do..." motif; it features scenarios in which people must endure five seconds of some torturous challenge in order to receive Klondike's new "What the Fudge? Brownie" ice-cream sandwich. One of the new ads depicts has a husband barely making it through five seconds of listening to his wife talk about her day.

The one that really got our attention, though, involves two bikers. Check out the video after the jump.

Putting aside the irony of the leather chaps (and, for that matter, two grown men competing for a brownie), the moral of this story is quite simple: men holding hands is teh gay -- a behavior so repulsive that requiring a (presumed) heterosexual to do it for five seconds constitutes a challenge of such epic proportions that success must be rewarded with a heroic celebration, complete with hot chicks and, yes, a fudge brownie ice cream sandwich.

Of course, gay bashing being older than dirt, it certainly predates mass-market advertising.

Here, then, are seven further examples of the homophobic ad oeuvre:

7. Snickers and Mr. T
Our story begins with a flamboyant little fellow wearing short, tight canary-yellow shorts power-walking down the street with an exaggerated sashay. Out of nowhere, a souped-up 4x4 pickup equipped with a gun turret bursts through a nearby house.

Manned by that '80s icon of masculinity, Mr. T, the Mad Max-esque vehicle stalks and overtakes the walker, whereupon Mr. T calls him "a disgrace to the man race" and pelts him with Snickers bars as punishment before admonishing him to "get some nuts."

And thus the viewer learns a valuable lesson: If you're not macho through and through, then it's OK to re-masculinize you via violence.

Snickers TV Commercial - Get Some Nuts

6. Doritos Ad (Brazil)
In this commercial four young men are riding in a car listening to the Village People hit, "YMCA." That's acceptable, it seems -- until one member of the quartet exhibits a little too much in the way of appreciation.

Taken to task for the homophobic depiction, PepsiCo. responded by explaining that the humor derives from the fact that the song is dated and most of us have made a fool of ourselves by performing the silly choreography. Are you buying that?

5. The Snickers Kiss
You may recall this ad, in which two auto mechanics inadvertently lock lips whilst munching on the same Snickers bar. It was fodder for the water cooler after the Super Bowl in 2007 -- and engendered so much hue and cry that Snickers ended up pulling the spot.

Not long ago we read that "Gay Teen Suicide Rates [Are] Higher in Conservative Areas." But hey, if it's funny and sells candy, who gives a crap?

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6 comments
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Chose
Chose

While I agree totally on most of these being homophobic, the klondike bar ad is playing on the stereotype of homophobic bikers who are ashamed of promiscuity with other men. Doesn't really sound homophobic to me.

SpyderWeb
SpyderWeb

But gay bashing is so much fun! No worse than every guy being portrayed an idiot while some woman is a fucking genius.

CamRon
CamRon

You think that Klondike commercial was "gay bashing"?? Give me a fucking break, that's an insult to people who have experienced REAL gay bashing

skoz
skoz

Most of these are pretty... yeah... but I think you're being a little hard on the Klondike bar spot. I mean, it references forcing "a moment of intimacy" between two dudes who depict the epitome of the non-intimate tough-guy. I think it's poking fun more at guys who don't like holding hands and hugging period, not just with other guys. Point being, I don't think the bikers depicted are supposed to be thinking "This is so gay", but rather "This is way too touchy-feely for me". Feel free to disagree, and maybe I'm splitting hairs, but I think there's a difference between guys with intimacy issues who don't especially like hugging and holding hands (to be honest, I sometimes fall into this camp), and guys with homophobia issues.

ProjectMelton
ProjectMelton

That's a fair enough point, but at the same time they take that intimacy issue and magnify it to such a degree that it seems to suggest something much bigger than what you just described.

Even if you're uncomfortable holding hands with someone, we're talking a meager five seconds. So when something that brief is presented as an extreme challenge worthy of excessive celebration it tends to say more than "I don't like to be touchy-feely."

Also, if that ad is solely about intimacy issues and not sexuality, then why the addition of stereotypically hot women in short skirts at the end?

Amy_in_StL
Amy_in_StL

I've been in leadership training courses where people are asked to step inside someone else's comfort zone when talking to them. Most of the men there demonstrated that their comfort zone was about three to four feet - and they refused to go any further. Most straight guys wouldn't hold hands with another straight guy on camera for anything. I think you're underestimating how uncomfortable most American Hetero men are with closeness.

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