Osama bin Laden Felching the Fat Dixie Chick, and 6 Other Appropriately Themed Celebratory Cocktails

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​A dispatch Monday afternoon from the all-things-food site Eater.com noted that restaurants are offering drink specials in honor of the killing of Public Enemy No. 1 Osama bin Laden.

A few establishments among the handful of examples Eater cited were serving free drinks, but the majority were merely offering discounts, and all appeared to be using the occasion of the fallen al-Qaeda leader purely as a marketing ploy, and only a couple even went to the trouble of ginning up a themed beverage. Then again, this is America: Land of the free, home of the avaricious.

With all due respect to Uncle Fatty's Rum Resort in Chicago and its specialty cocktails (the "Floating Terrorist" and "Osama Been Shot") and the Candi Shack in Seattle with its dollar coffee with an "Osama bin Laden Shot in the Dark," you can do just as well at your local watering hole, or at home, with these seven recipes...

7. The Osama bin Laden
For the reveler who desires something basic and straightforward, just to whet the ol' whistle...
1 oz. absinthe
1 dash Tabasco sauce (or more, to taste)

6. The Osama Shooter
Want to up the ante a little? Well, you're going to have to do so with four different potent substances, and one of them is Jäger. In other words, this would go down nicely on Fraternity Row.
1/4 oz. vodka
1/4 oz. tequila
1/4 oz. rum
1/4 oz. Jägermeister

5. The Dead Bastard
Speaks for itself.
1 oz. brandy
1 oz. bourbon
1 oz. gin
1 oz. rum
1/2 oz. lime juice
1 dash bitters
1 oz. ginger ale
Ice

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4. The Shitface
See No. 5 above. Neither of these drinks is bin Laden specific, but who cares? This one actually looks pretty good.
2 oz. 151 proof rum
1 oz. grenadine
1 oz. simple syrup
Fill with orange juice

Pour rum, grenadine, and sugar syrup into a shaker. Fill with orange juice. Add ice and shake, strain into glass and garnish with maraschino cherry.

3. The Flaming Asshole
Like No.'s 4 and 5 above, this beverage could be consumed at any time. Yes, the name seems suitable, but it might just as well apply to the patron who orders it. Yuck.
1/2 oz. grenadine
1/2 oz green crème de menthe
1/2 oz. crème de banane
1/2 oz. light rum

Layer in this order: grenadine, crème de menthe, crème de banane, rum. Ignite rum. Serve with a straw.

2. The Osama bin Laden Felching the Fat Dixie Chick
Gut Check will down one of these, but only because we like artichokes.
1-1/4 oz. Cynar artichoke liqueur
1-1/2 oz. DeKuyper Pomegranate Schnapps
1-1/2 oz. DeKuyper Pucker Berry Fusion Schnapps


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2 comments
Abcd
Abcd

Mitch is just a recovering alcoholic and can not stand to see other people drink.

mitch52
mitch52

The way this article can be so crude and disturbing in such a casual way says alot about our culture.

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