Best and Worst Halloween Candy Countdown: No. 19

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It wasn't all that long ago that Gut Check was donning our finest Disney princess Star Wars character drag outfit and joining the swarms of greedy American children on the hallowed Halloween quest for candy. So we remember well the post-trick-or-treat ritual of sorting the bounty into two piles, i.e., Good Stuff and Crap.

Then we'd head back out and t.p. all the houses where we'd been handed lame candy. We considered the act to be a hint to the clueless to maybe bust out the Snickers next year instead of those execrable homemade popcorn balls. A community service, if you will.

Now we're on the other side of the door, trick-or-treatily speaking, and we're also working from a position of strength when it comes to stamping out Halloween-candy imbecility.

Want to avoid having your happy home t.p.'ed this year? Check back each weekday between now and the Big Day as we count down the 21 Best Halloween Treats and the 21 Worst Halloween Treats...

Best Halloween Candy Countdown, No. 19: Gummi Bears
First of all, we must acknowledge that there are dozens of brands of Gummi Bears. The best, of course, is Haribo Gold Bears. They're perfectly chewy (not too soft, like many other brands), and the flavors are vibrant. They're slightly greasy, which is way better than that funky dust or sugar coating that's on other bears. Plus, with a little saliva you can make them stick to almost anything, including more Gummi Bears! Stick them to your friends' faces, pose them on a table or make them do filthy things to other innocent Bears. The possibilities are boundless.

Click through to reveal No. 19 on the Worst Halloween Candy list...

Worst Halloween Candy Countdown, No. 19: Necco Wafers

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​Everyone knows there are only three decent Necco Wafer varieties: brown, white and pink. And while all-chocolate wafer rolls exist, the traditional Necco rainbow leaves much to be desired, and inevitably ends up in the trash. Plus, the simple, old-fashioned chalky wafers don't exactly cater to the modern kid's sensibilities -- if someone gave us a roll of the things, we'd eat all the chocolate ones and scatter the rest in their yard. Jerks.

Check out the rest of our Best and Worst Halloween Candy Countdown.

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Mike N.
Mike N.

How dare you besmirch Necco wafers!  What's not to love about a candy that actually has a clove-flavored variety?   The only other clove candy I know of is Clove chewing gum, sold alongside Beemans and Black Jack gum.

BTW, a few on my worst list:  Root beer barrels, Bit-o-Honey, Ice Cubes (the chocolate kind, not the frozen water kind.)


This is certainly not true - the best gummy bears are sold by Bears & Buddies!They have over 45 different flavors and they are made with glucose syrup instead of the fructose syrup! On top of that they are made with real fruit juice (some of them have even real fruit pieces in them), are gluten free, lactose free, some sugar free or organic - they taste delicious - not one single brand can even come close to their quality and perfection - this is how gummy bears should taste - not what you are describing!

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