14 St. Louis Celebrities Who Ought to Name a Candy After Themselves

Categories: List Mania!

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This un-doctored photo of Jenna Fischer captures "Jenna Swedish Fischer" better than Gut Check's rudimentary PhotoShop skills ever could.
Jenna's Swedish Fischer
There's no way Jenna Fischer wasn't making this list. Lucky for Gut Check, Fischer's last name offers a rather obvious candy conclusion in Jenna's Swedish Fischer. Who knows? It might even spawn a companion Jenna's Swedish Fischer vodka brand, if executed properly.

Albert Pujols' Payday
These candy bars taste very good but cost $254 million. Unfortunately we're really only prepared to pay $210 million. C'est la vie.

Todd Akin's Legitimate Peeps
They were only briefly relevant this past year, and even then: barf.

Charles Lindbergh's Spirit of St. Chew-Us Saltwater Taffy
Well, Charles Lindbergh and saltwater taffy are both products of America, nostalgia-inducing for old people and best when near an ocean. So. Sure.

Lindbergh's Baby Ruth
If the taffy tanks, there's always Lindbergh's Baby Ruth. We even thought of a catchy slogan: "So good, everyone will want to steal it from you!"


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