The Ten Worst Music Tattoos

Categories: List-O-Rama

britney_spears_tattoo.jpg
AHHHHHH!!
The mainstream ubiquity of tattoos is nothing new, but it does make for some pretty hilarious/horrendous Google searches. We chatted with two local tattoo artists to see what regrettable tattoos St. Louisians are getting these days.

Iron Age Tattoo's Joseph Reincke said nothing surprises him after nineteen years of professional inking. Unsurprisingly, he's done a lot of Iron Maiden and Grateful Dead tattoos over the years. When asked if he's given any Insane Clown Posse tattoos, he rolls his eyes and nods ruefully: "lots of hatchet men." He's tried talking people out of branding themselves with the mark of the Juggalo, but said they always end up getting the tat anyway. "They're down with the clown. Anyone that wears funny pants like that is going to get bad tattoos," Reincke said.

Chris Greer, of Enigma Tattoos in the Loop, said he recently inked an eighteen-year-old kid with "Juggalo for Life" on top of his hatchet man tattoo. "He looks at it while I was doing it and said, 'Well, I hope I really like this band for a long time,'" Greer says.

Though each artist mentioned that too many words do not make great dermatological graffiti, the tattoos Greer and Reincke cited as cool were lyrics, and both were penned, (at least in part) by John Lennon. Reincke said he did Lennon's "Imagine" on a guy, and few weeks ago Greer had a client ask for "Blackbird."

A big trend Reincke seeing lately? "The treble clef-bass clef-heart thing."

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Greer said he gets a lot of kids who want the same tattoo as their favorite rapper, "even if they're bad tattoos." (We're looking at you, Lloyd.) Greer said he won't give someone a face tattoo like Gucci Mane's lame ass ice cream cone unless they're already pretty well covered--"There's no coming back from that." Stars and crosses are still hugely popular (blech) proving that just because you're committing art to your body doesn't mean you have a shred of imagination.

"A lot of times things just won't translate into a tattoo. Names are a bad idea unless it's your parents or your kid's name," said Reincke. Reincke doesn't have any music-related tattoos, but Greer does: a Social Distortion chest piece, and Clutch lyrics on his back.

Greer and Reincke may have had to ink on some truly horrible stuff. But it gets so much worse: Observe, the ten worst music-related tattoos:

HansonTattoo.jpg
10. So glad my mom didn't let me get that "Future Mrs. Taylor Hanson" tattoo back in '97.

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10 comments
devilsmiley666
devilsmiley666

get over juggalos already. god. they aren't hurting anyone.

QueenOfEveryWickedClownHeart
QueenOfEveryWickedClownHeart

Haha @ coolio bc he been down esp as long as iced tea since many Gatherings ago so tht does suck but fukn right on tha faygo hatchetman wish id of thought of that WHOOP WHOOP!! MMFWKCL FAM!!!

Anonymous
Anonymous

Bullshit that's Metallica, that's the Joseph Merrick Quartet

King Skalmad
King Skalmad

Question for Greer: Did that guy with that Blackbird lyrics get that over the tattoo of Paul McCartney jacking off Macauley Caulkin into Michael Jackson's mouth, or under it?

jinx
jinx

This is a travesty -- no Earth Crisis Face?

Bill Burge
Bill Burge

There's an MMA podcast called Full Contact Fighter Radio that had a great thing on Belcher's tattoo as he was having it worked on.  It started out bad and just kept getting worse.

Albert
Albert

I hope some juggalo scourges you and your family.

scott19674
scott19674 topcommenter

@QueenOfEveryWickedClownHeart Please get a hysterectomy. Thank you.

diana benanti
diana benanti

he needs to get that shit lasered off and start over. 

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