Taylor Swift Just Took Her Pop Queen Throne. All Hail!

Categories: Fiesta!

Taylor Swift - We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together.jpg
Well, I feel vindicated. For years I've been screaming that Taylor Swift is really "a pop powerhouse masquerading as a young country-music heroine" and now I finally have proof.

I'm a long-time believer in the the many talents of T-Swizzle. And while her gaggingly adorable IWearMyCoffeeShopOutfitWhenIGoToTheCoffeeShop-ness sometimes still makes me want to punch her, when it comes to the tunes my homegirl can do no wrong.

See also:
Taylor Swift Is Saving America
Taylor Swift Is Destroying America
Taylor Swift at the Scottrade Center, 8/14/11: Review, Photos, Setlist

Her new single, "We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together" is a pop monster. It's slick and big and catchy as a mofo-- it's everything a pop single should be. With a chorus that is best described as a piston-powered cheerleader chant, repetitive lyrics about a relatable subject and a play time of just over three minutes, this lil' guy was clearly engineered for the radio. Its sing-along qualities mean that you can hear it once and then have it stuck in your head for hours, even if you hate it. To me, that is the mark of a great pop song. If this song is any indication of the sound on her forthcoming album, Red, her days as a "country" star are fading.

Many of you will listen and think What fresh hell is this? And I thought that, too, for about twenty seconds. At first I was annoyed by the over-simplified lyrics and the flow-ruining talking bits. I was like Aww, man. What is this mess? Girl, you are a grown-ass businesswoman-- knock if off with the adolescent shit.

And then I realized something important: Taylor Swift is making fun of herself! She's acknowledging what we all think of her and she's also making fun of her dating history and her dumb girl emotions. T-Swizzle is totally in on the joke. What a relief.

Now be a good student of pop culture and listen to this song. Or give it a play just to get used to it because it's never going to leave your head. A new contender for Best Summer Jam of 2012 has just arrived.

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