Six Tips for Dating a Musician

Categories: Sound Advice


3: Balance Your Opinion

You are not his manager. Maybe at home your word is law, but not here. Your opinion needs to be perfectly balanced. He will probably ask you what you thought of the set or new song or album. Remember, you are there to support, so you think it sounds good. But that doesn't mean you can't tell him when it sucked. Tact comes in handy. Start with what was good and then add your true opinion. If you are attending shows a lot, remember that not everyone there has seen the performance over and over and therefore probably didn't notice the tiny mistake. Take things from the position of the crowd. When things are rough, let him know, that way he can improve them next time around. "Honey, you just can't have eight whiskeys before you go on stage. Puking in the bucket did not make the set cooler."

4: Proper Show Behavior

Do not distract him from the show. He is focused, he is determined, he is trying to perform. So please, do not yell out "That's my boyfriend" or "That's my baby daddy" while he is on stage. You may get bored while he is up there. Maybe you have seen him perform over 100 times. No matter what, do not turn into a wasted mess. Save the nights that you need a babysitter for when he is not playing; he is not going to come off the stage and stop you from making an absolute fool of yourself. Plus acting a fool makes him look bad. St. Louis is a small city, people will find out. Do not be this chick.

While you are enjoying his set, sipping casually on your drink, understand there may be a hole you need to fill. This hole is the merchandise booth: Work the merch booth if no one else can. This typically happens while the band is actually on stage, but it is during this time that fans decide whether or not they are going to buy something. If no one is there to take the money, one of two things will happen: They won't buy anything or they will steal it.

Lastly, do not get jealous if chicks hit on him. Remember when you were gazing at him from the crowd all googly-eyed? Well there are other chicks out there doing the same thing. They are going to want to flirt with him. They do not know or care if he is in a relationship with you. Trust and have faith, unless you have already broken some of these rules, he is still most likely coming home with you at the end of the night (especially if you have driven him and helped carry all of his gear). Flirting with girls is part of the job. It usually gets them to buy stuff.


My Voice Nation Help
23 comments
reeeaaaallllly
reeeaaaallllly

According to this article, I guess St. Louis doesn't have any female musicians? Also, according to the December 20-26 issue, "2012: year in music" St. Louis doesn't have any non-white musicians either. Funny, given the make-up of the population of this city.
Keep up the good journalism ya hipster douche bags!

jennmderose
jennmderose

Cassie, you can do it though.. Ryne is a peach.

jennmderose
jennmderose

Dating musicians....I have some tips of my own:

1. Don't do it.

2 .If you must do it, do not go to every show. You will hate him, yourself, and the fans.

3. Be prepared to spend a lot of time by yourself. Get a sweet creative hobby. 

4. Don't do it. Really. 

meaghanselm
meaghanselm

@ellenchart @rftmusic Patience my dear. Long gigs/practices, once a date night now a speed lunch/facetime chat, watch him flirt with others.

JamieTDrew
JamieTDrew

@fgrant2 yes, yes, sexist nonsense written by a teenager, but can we talk about how terrible the band name "The Hobosexuals" is?

pgh_guy
pgh_guy

@tedgioia Perhaps the sequel should be entitled "Sex tips for dating a musician."

meaghanselm
meaghanselm

@ellenchart since it was written by @rftmusic I can only assume it will be incredibly inaccurate but I'll let you know when I read it.

rftmusic
rftmusic

@ericdpeters @rftmusic thanks for the RT!

madebylaurenb
madebylaurenb

@ericdpeters @rftmusic I would have liked this to be less gender biased. Creative-types are girls, too.

hsmith5
hsmith5

What about female musicians...?

Kenny Snarzyk
Kenny Snarzyk

I approve, and I date all the cool musicians.

RFT Music
RFT Music

Normandie Wilson does not approve.

fgrant2
fgrant2

@JamieTDrew I know, absolutely hideous. What is wrong with these people?

rftmusic
rftmusic

@madebylaurenb @ericdpeters There's an explanation in the open that explains that it applies equally to any gender.

jennmderose
jennmderose

@MegazordButts @jennmderose

Not even close. Why, you looking?

I just think that trying to date a musician because they play music is an incredibly stupid reason... And I really like Cassie, but the piece comes off sounding pretty damn submissive. 

madebylaurenb
madebylaurenb

@rftmusic I think that point got lost pretty quickly. An afterthought is just that, I guess.

Daniel_Hill
Daniel_Hill

@madebylaurenb When I reply here on the post, are you alerted about it on Twitter? I'm not sure how that works, honestly. Anyway, i dislike the curt nature of Twitter's wordcount limits, so allow me to explain myself here:

I considered exactly this point that you are bringing up when editing this post, and my options were either to insert a "disclaimer" of sorts into the opening paragraph or to change all the he's and him's into he/she him/her, which reads horribly. My point that the author of the piece is a female (and a kickass, creative writer-type of a female, at that) was merely to say that it is written this way because it was written from the perspective of a girl with a boyfriend in a band, and so therefore it is her experience. No disrespect intended.

rftmusic
rftmusic

@madebylaurenb The only other option would have been an article filled with he/shes and him/hers. Worth nothing that the author is female.

Now Trending

St. Louis Concert Tickets

From the Vault

 

Loading...