Yes, I'm in Love With a Stripper
Welcome to Ask Willie D, where the Geto Boys MC answers reader questions about matters, in his own words, "funny, serious or unpredictable." Something on your mind? Ask Willie D!
Dear Willie D:
I loaned my cousin $500 more than six months ago. She promised to pay me back when she got paid two weeks from the time I gave her the money, but to this day I have yet to see one red cent. The puzzling thing is that we were so close until this incident happened. While growing up we did everything together: sleepovers, birthday parties, gymnastics, dance, you name it. Once we became adults the pattern continued with girls' nights out, shopping trips and get togethers. I am also the godmother to her daughter.
It makes me sick to my stomach that I am in this position fighting with someone who I considered to be a best friend and sister. My cousin knows that I'm merely getting by with living expenses and really didn't have the money to give in the first place.
I have asked her several times for my money back. At first she gave me excuses like, "Oh, I'll pay you next week. I had to use the money for car repairs." Then she started being evasive by not returning my calls. The other day I went over to her house to confront her and we got into a big altercation.
I still love my cousin, but I want my money back. Do you know of a way I can get her to repay me and salvage our friendship?
Burned By a Relative:
You stand a better chance seeing the Pope at a Geto Boys concert doing the Dougie than you stand getting your scratch back. There are three things in life you should never do: cheer for the visiting team, rat out a friend and loan money to relatives. Like you, I learned the latter the hard way. If you didn't do it this time, listen now: Before you loan anyone money in the future, make sure she signs a promissory note. I don't care if it's your mama.
Since your cousin is dodging you, send her a certified letter in the mail with a date for her to start paying you installments on the loan. Let her know if she doesn't agree to the terms or miss a payment you will drag her butt into a small claims court. On the other hand, if your cousin is willing to jeopardize a lifelong friendship over a few hundred dollars, maybe the loan was a blessing in disguise, and that's what it took to expose who she truly is: an ungrateful user. If that's the case, it only cost you $500 to get rid of her.
HELP ME CHOOSE MY MATRON OF HONOR
Dear Willie D:
I really need your help with making the proper decision. Right after my future husband and I announced we were tying the knot, one of the first questions every female in my life wanted to know was, "Who will be the matron of honor?" I have a few close friends in my circle, but none has been closer longer than my childhood friend. So when I told my newest close friend of the past two years of my choice, she all of a sudden became aloof and short with me.
I don't know what to think of my friend's about-face. I mean, dang, I value our friendship, but I've had pimples last longer than she's been around. I'm starting to get anxiety over all of this mess. How should I tell her that I consider her to be a good friend but my childhood friend will be my matron of honor without further hurting her feelings and damaging our friendship?
Call her up and say, "Hey, I hope you're not upset with me about not being my matron of honor. It doesn't mean that I value your friendship any less. This is something that was in place before I ever met you. If you're up to it I would be honored if you were one of my bridesmaids or was involved in planning everything." If she can't respect that flip out, tell her, "Look you self-absorbed, immature wench: My childhood friend will be the matron of honor at my wedding. If you don't like it, screw you!"