Check Out at This Angry Letter From a One Direction Fan

Categories: Serrano Time

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Last week, I wrote about why One Direction's "Story of My Life" sucks.

Usually, whenever one of these pieces goes up (and they go up often), I get a handful of tweets or e-mails letting me know that A) I am a faggot, or B) I should go F myself. Occasionally, when someone has been especially offended, they'll even combine the two, which is truly inspired.

See Also: Katy Perry's "Roar": Why This Song Sucks

Following the One Direction post, however, I received something particularly special: a letter from "Dedicated Directioner" Ellen. I was a taken aback because there were no curse words, and she didn't even accuse me of having placed things inside my butthole.

It was, however, unintentionally hilarious. Which is why I drew some pictures to make sense of the whole situation.

"Shea,

Speaking on the behalf of the Directioners, I feel that you have no right to write an entire hate article about this song and One Direction. Oh, so none of them can sing or dance? I wonder why they were put into a band on the X-Factor because Simon Cowell said that they were too valuable to lose? Because they could sing.

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Can't dance? That's true, they even said it themselves, but so, do all boy bands have to be like the stereotypical boy bands? Why do you hate it so much? Just because you don't like the lyrics don't criticize them for it. You're taking them too literally. I mean, use your deep imagination skills.

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Also, you take the lyrics from a different point of view compared to people who decide to enjoy the music. For example: "Leave my heart open but it stays right here in its cage," meaning he let his heart out for another person but they didn't take it, saying that he or she doesn't love him.

Another one: "Running after you is like chasing the clouds," meaning it's impossible for him to catch her because it's impossible to catch a cloud. You could go under it, over it and pass through it, but never could you ever catch a cloud.

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The reason One Direction are still here is because they are the most successful boy band on earth. They have great personalities, are down to earth people. You don't have many stories of them causing trouble, unlike Justin Bieber. And they have the most dedicated fan bases around the world. They constantly donate and do things for charities, as well as visiting children's hospitals.

All of them have different personalities; caring, funny, carefree, flirty, mysterious.

Continue to page two for more.



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40 comments
Stacey Barbeau
Stacey Barbeau

i like them actually... good kids... catchy music.... id rather listen to them than kanye

Luke Valleroy
Luke Valleroy

The writers from RFT are becoming bigger tools everyday. Who cares about what kind of music someone likes? Everyone is different and likes different things.You guys are bigger bullies than Richie Incognito..

Derek Baker
Derek Baker

Love the analysis of the song lyrics haha

Steve Pona
Steve Pona

Poor child. Obviously a victim of poor parenting. She never stood a chance.

Laura Dee
Laura Dee

Why do you post everything twice?

Laura Dee
Laura Dee

Real mature to answer a fan mail like this. I mean, I don't like One Direction, either, but let's be adults about it, shall we? No need to bash a person's love for something as harmless as a terrible band.

Ronda Evansco-Brooks
Ronda Evansco-Brooks

I think that was hilarious!!!"Carry On Wayward Son" was written by Kansas, not Mumford&Son.

Cat Pick
Cat Pick

Yeah, I got that. As if I give a fuck what the RFT says. Seriously?

Chris Ward
Chris Ward

My first thought was "oh I bet Cat wrote this!" when I thought it was an anonymous person.

Cat Pick
Cat Pick

Like shooting fish in a barrel, huh? Har dee har har.

Brandon Herges
Brandon Herges

I just searched on youtube and that atrocity of a band has never done Carry on my Wayward Son as a cover, as far as I can tell.

Chris Frank
Chris Frank

1 - I'm willing to bet that Ellen is what we like to call "younger demographic". 2 - While she may not know that Kansas wrote Carry On My Wayward Son, I'm willing to bet WE ALL mistook a cover for an original song when younger. 3 - Obviously the musical tastes of a One Direction fan won't sync well with the tastes of someone who has since outgrown the teen pop demo. Pop music is ear candy. While an adult may like the diverse flavors and textures of a nice steak or complex musical artist... you know what kids want? SUGAR! ALL OF THE SUGAR!!! That's what One Direction is. & much like the boy bands of the last 40 years, they will go away as their demo grows up, leading to another band to take their place for a new generation. It doesn't suck, but it's unashamedly simple, for a simple young audience. And just like any other fan of any other musical act, be it pop, rock, hip hop, jazz, or hipster, nobody likes to be told their baby is ugly. Of course she would defend it as best she is able

Matthew Pickett
Matthew Pickett

Perhaps the better question would be do One Direction fans even know what the mail is?!

Jacqueline Hadley
Jacqueline Hadley

That's the part that got me too. That song is by KANSAS. This chick was high on something.

Jane Dohack
Jane Dohack

What the... Why....No. Just no. Mumford & Son's song Carry On My Wayward Son? Supernatural, a BBC series? Oh geez. Other than those points, I got a good laugh. And the cloud comic... loved!

Joan Reeves
Joan Reeves

That's what you get for trying to seriously analyze their music. :)

Angela Vincent
Angela Vincent

In my family when you say or do something particularly awesome we say "give that bitch a $1"...this deserves a $5 lol

Mike Cave
Mike Cave

I literally just laughed myself to tears!!! Quite possibly the funniest thing EVER!!

Neil Ghanti
Neil Ghanti

Patrick Swayze got off easy, he died before One Direction shat its stinky musical turd upon the world. He likely is chuckling at Ellen's letter right now, as he soars shirtless through the heavens like a Greek god whilst trying to catch ever elusive clouds.

Rick Kohn
Rick Kohn

A sad state of today's music when you judge talent on how well you do on X factor or American Idiot.

Liz Lundvall
Liz Lundvall

Someone needs to learn a little Kansas! Then maybe you won't get silly letters like this. What is wrong with this world!?!?

awesomejobgreatjob
awesomejobgreatjob

the most hilarious fan letter: YOU JUST DON'T LIKE IT BC YOU JUST DON'T UNDERSTAAAAAND  ; n ;

Christina Toth
Christina Toth

Does she really think Mumford and Sons created Carry On my wayward Son?

John Violinja
John Violinja

This is even better than your article about One Direction!

Amanda Woolsey
Amanda Woolsey

One direction has a fan old enough to mail a letter?

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