Yeehaw! Missouri Ranks As No. 3 State Where Life Is Like a Country Song

Categories: LOLZ, WTF

EstatelyCountryMusicMap2014_565.jpg
Estately
Save a horse, ride a cowboy. Or, you know, just hop into your pickup truck.

Are we really living out country songs here in Missouri? Hound dogs, pickup trucks, moonshine and the works, to the extent of being the third-most country-fried state in the nation? Armed with tons of data, national real estate site Estately challenges that it's possible. Oh, joy.

We've been burned in the past with weird data factories claiming to have the pulse of the country. Anyone remember when the Echo Nest swore that the most popular band in Missouri was the Shins? Yeah, that was kind of crazy. (We think our very scientific discovery about the least popular bands in the states was way better.)

See also:
- U.S. Map Displays Most Popular Musicians By State
- New Map Shows the LEAST Popular Musicians By State

But Estately really dove into the research, using its mysterious real estate connections to figure out which states' residents are most likely to have lifestyles resembling popular themes in country music. "To do this, we researched where people are most likely to drive pickups down dirt roads, have their heart broken by a cowboy or cowgirl, or sip cold beers or whiskey by the river after a long day of work," Estately says.

Estately used nine criteria to guide its research through various databases (These are Estately's categories, not ours, we swear):


  • Pickup trucks: pickup truck sales for January-April 2014

  • Drinkin': per capita beer and liquor consumption

  • Baby done left: percentage of men and women who are divorced or separated

  • Most religious: percentage of population that says religion is an important part of their daily life

  • Cowboys and cowgirls: "Since there's no cowboy directory, we simply measured the number of cattle and calves per square mile" through cattlerange.com, Estately says.

  • Hall of Fame country musicians: number of country musicians in the Country Music Hall of Fame who were born in each state

  • Dirt roads: miles of unpaved roads managed by the Federal Highway Administration

  • Support the troops: active military personnel in each state

  • Work until the day is through: ranked from lowest unemployment rate to highest

Estately has a chart with how each state fared in each of the nine categories above. While Missouri was pretty average, all told, we ranked in the top ten in three of the nine categories, which was enough to land us the third-highest spot in the country-livin' poll after Oklahoma and Texas.

On page two, see a pretty chart showing which aspects of country-song life Missouri is exceptionally good at.


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50 comments
David Biernbaum
David Biernbaum

This is true in "Missourah" but not so much in St. Louis. We're in a different state of our own.

Katie Beth
Katie Beth

Kristin Vohs haha is this true for you?

Erik Olsen
Erik Olsen

Now, how is it that the area that is more concerned about where you went to high school than any other part of your past surprise anyone about this?

Amy Boothe
Amy Boothe

Rachael ...how did this happen? LOL!

Bob Stclair
Bob Stclair

Alexandra lugger ! Your butt fuckin homosexual tree hugging ways ! Is why we don't want them here ! So take your flock of segales an the cure an go somewhere else ! Give us SLAYER AN SLIPKNOT !

Bob Stclair
Bob Stclair

This guy ^^^ king ass tard ! Really ? I can go all day without your feakel matter jokes ! Do farts smell like sex to you folks? Why is ir every time one of you kind talks ? It sounds like a leaky bicycle tire ! WE GET IT ! YOU LIKE HAIRY BUTTHOLE ! you don't have to sound more feminist than a women !

King Maxwell Dclxcvi
King Maxwell Dclxcvi

Okay, Jethro, wipe the flecks of foam off your keyboard and get back to molesting the livestock.

King Maxwell Dclxcvi
King Maxwell Dclxcvi

Before putting anything in my ass, you're going to need to buy me an expensive dinner and tell me that you love me.

Bethany Hamilton
Bethany Hamilton

Jameson Clerk why u reading the EGYPT if ur so "country"?

Nathan Schunks
Nathan Schunks

Wow... we beat Arkansas AND Alabama?! I'm moving lol

Laura Dee
Laura Dee

No..... "Missourah" is the 3rd most country. Get it right. "Missouri" is basically a different state where we don't wear cowboy hats or listen to country "music" or chew tobacco or hate on gays.

Jameson Clerk
Jameson Clerk

I don't own a horse. Nor have I ever stepped in cow shit.

Jason Charney
Jason Charney

[Acts like a white trash asshole] WOO HOO! ALLOW ME TO STATE I DON'T HAVE HEALTH INSURANCE! TEEF ARE FOR LIBERALS! [gums gums]

Bigpeeler1
Bigpeeler1

This certainly explains my recent divorce. My wife literally left me for a guy who lives in the country, drives a pick-up, has one eye and posts pictures of himself on his tractor.

Alexandra Lugger
Alexandra Lugger

#3 in Countriness, but #1 in dorks who think that just because they live in St. Louis, that they're masters of culture lol. News flash, you may live in a city, but it's still a city in a flyover state known for walnut bowls and an entertainment industry based on hillbillies. You wanna be uppety, earn it and live in New York or LA.

Jeff Willett
Jeff Willett

Sure got somebody's panties bunched there.

Bob Stclair
Bob Stclair

P.s. I hate country ! An my gal of 8 year's is black ! So try to use the color of my skin as your racist tool :) pitifully sick blind tards

Bob Stclair
Bob Stclair

What does ....god or alia or moses have to do with it ? It's a thing about being called a redneck ! Its more about picking on a country song person than some buttt hole showing jackoff that cant speake english . Waht st.louis is really knowing for ! Country grammar ?

Jameson Clerk
Jameson Clerk

The worst part about the Hoosiers is how intolerant they are to people who are different. Unlike you who clearly is above all that.

Jameson Clerk
Jameson Clerk

Take that back! Gangbangers need to get right with our Lord Jesus Christ.

Bob Stclair
Bob Stclair

An # 3 on the murder states ! Only passed by Detroit an Atlanta ! What do these states have in comin ???? Anybody ????? Head's up ! It's the black community ! Facts ! Look at any black community crime rate posed to any white's ! Is it a racial obligation these folks feel ? Wtf ! First folks to yell about racial injustice ! But ture facts don't lie ! But I guess I'm a racist because of the color of my skin ! People that use that word truly have no intelligent come back about the truth about the social equality's about a society that is hell bent on being racist an corrupt ! Yes white folks commit crimes against other white folks ! But not at record numbers for a population square footage ! As society have we come to a point to where we understand that it's a black thing ? An look away as if it's a mentally challenged person that just pooped there pants ? Look at store's /restaurant' s streets anything ! An wondering why with so many people around the business doesn't work ? I'm sure some how it's the white man's fault ? God forbid someone stands up of color as BILL COSBY has done ! An admittedly said how this racially charged society is screwed ! Crap ! The black society has been freed for over 140year's now ! How long does it take to get your shit together ? An you weren't a slave or truly new a slave ! SO YES ! I'LL BE PROUD TO BE A COUNTRY SONG STATE ! It's much better than pimps an hoes ! I don't want to see your underwear either ! Pull up your pants ! An get a house or work on yours THAT COSTS MORE THAN YOUR CAR !!!!! IDIOT !

Chris Gold
Chris Gold

Jameson Clerk is really a ghetto gangbanger in disguise.

Jameson Clerk
Jameson Clerk

Y'all city folks are some uppity snobs. I'd like to put my boot up your ass.

Ryan J Winterbottom
Ryan J Winterbottom

Greaaaat!!! Now every retarded asshole who wears camo in the city limits now feels like they aren't complete pieces of shit!! Get out that dip and cowboy boots .... Good god

Alexandra Lugger
Alexandra Lugger

Duh. Go anywhere outside of StL Co. and you'll see what's up. Some people seem to forget that any place south of 70 is either bordering or is the Ozarks and all of that along 70 to KC is considered Little Dixie.

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