The Ten Biggest Douchebags In Country Music

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Courtesy of the label
Mainstream country music gets an unfair rap as being universally over-polished and formulaic, a notion that artists like Kacey Musgraves and Eric Church obliterate every time they strap on their guitars. But there's a granule of truth to the stereotype, and a particularly damaging subgenre -- known as "bro-country" -- is lending it far too much credibility right now.

See also: The 15 Most Ridiculous Band Promo Photos Ever

Booze, chicks, jacked-up pickups, extreme redneck sports, spring break -- artists like Luke Bryan, Florida Georgia Line and even Blake Shelton are leaning way too heavily on such themes in their music these days, and the entire trope can be summed up in one word: douchey. Yet bro-country isn't the only brand of 'baggery currently afflicting Nashville. No, douchebags are a diverse lot, and here are the ten biggest 'bags currently cranking out (s)hits in Music City today:

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Courtesy of the label
Toby Keith
10. Toby Keith
Drinking has long been fertile fodder for country songs. But for Keith, who has devoted entire concept albums to the topic, it's too often the only fodder. His lyrical over-reliance on the bottle is at least partially responsible for spawning bro-country, and Keith also bears a heavy burden for souring the Dixie Chicks on country radio (and vice versa), a setback from which Nashville's female insurgency is only now recovering.

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Courtesy of the label
Charles Kelley

9. Charles Kelley
He seems like a sweet, goofy guy, but sounds like supremo-'bag Michael Bolton, and is in a trio with "Lady" in its name. There's no place for the sort of soft-rock sheen Kelley brings to twang's table; it's high time Hillary Scott ditched the dudes and made Lady Antebellum all about the Lady.

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Ram Country
Dan + Shay

8. Dan + Shay
This douchey duo is managed by Belieber in Chief Scooter Braun. That's the only argument we need.

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Courtesy of the label
Chris Gaines/Garth Brooks

7. Garth Brooks
Brooks admirably took a decade off in his prime to focus on his family, but we still can't get the Chris Gaines debacle out of our head, nor can we entirely dismiss it as the reason for Brooks' "retirement" in the first place.


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173 comments
Brandon Mudd
Brandon Mudd

Having met the long haired guy from FGL, I can that absolutely he's a douche. He was at an event that I was working & he had bodyguard/handler who looked about a biscuit from 400 lbs tell everyone there they couldn't take pics even though he was only there to help promote our event. Came off as totally affected & above everyone around him except his millionaire friend who invited him.

Matt Guido
Matt Guido

I heard RFT likes Dwight Yoakam..........jus sayin

Silence Dogood
Silence Dogood

LOL Daniel Ramero and Catlin Rose compared to Loretta Lynn? What a joke.

Silence Dogood
Silence Dogood

Ok lets do the top 10 biggest douchebags at RFT. Is that number too low?

Kellen Borchers
Kellen Borchers

Add Brett Mcelridge to this list. He is a WWAH. (Wolf whistling ...)

Reed Paladino
Reed Paladino

BAAAAAAM. Done with FRT pointing the finger. D-o-n-e

Krissy Stone
Krissy Stone

Toby Keith and Chuck Berry are Non-tipping douches. Go next door rft and ask GB for a nickle.

Heather Peebles
Heather Peebles

They lost me at the point where they said pitbull was bad. Lol

Cathy Wall
Cathy Wall

Mindy, they have Luke at no 2. Wtf.

Ryan Sevener
Ryan Sevener

I'd put Jason Aldean in there ahead of Garth or Toby, Chris Gains was douchey but "No Fences" and "Ropin the Wind" are flat classics.

Zack Thatcher
Zack Thatcher

I totally agree with this article, but am also curious about what country/americana/alt-country/red dirt artists RFT are fans of. Speak now RFT or forever be berated for hating on stuff.

Jayden Mckenzie
Jayden Mckenzie

Another article that will piss off the racists. Keep up the good work RFT

Justin Petrovic
Justin Petrovic

RFT probably doesn't like country singers because they assume they're all racist... I can see it now, "Top ten most racist country singers" will be the headlines next week

Laura Hobson Bond
Laura Hobson Bond

Really RFT? Regardless of who likes what kind of music, this is just proof that another media outlet feels like it's no big deal to use the keyboard to bully a personal choice.

Brian O'Shea
Brian O'Shea

Considering this article, I'm quite curious as to what Country artists RFT is a fan of. Or will there be silence on that? I'm going to ASSume the latter.

Denny Barrett
Denny Barrett

Lol Chris Gaines/Garth Brooks and lol country rap

Zack Thatcher
Zack Thatcher

It's funny because it's true (except the Garth part, leave Garth out of it) :)

Preston Kamler
Preston Kamler

As if the Riverfront Times opinion even matters. You're irrelevant.

Victor Malmgren
Victor Malmgren

I was laughing all the way until Garth. LEAVE GARTH ALONE! But still... well done.

Drew Somervell
Drew Somervell

There is great country music out there but you won't hear it on the radio. The masses have already proven to Nashville that they will shell out money for anything they are fed. As long as it follows the formula, it doesn't have to be good.

rettamichaels
rettamichaels

I agree with everything except for Kenny Chesney... A guy who has an ass that hot needs to be done! Yeah, I'd do him until a spork went in! Pass the grits!

Sanz Wilson
Sanz Wilson

Lmao!! I whole heartedly agree! I cannot stand any artist on this list. In fact I don't like country at all.

Drew Somervell
Drew Somervell

I always shame people for listening to "young country".

Christina Toth
Christina Toth

Exactly but I know plenty of people who like country music so I try to be mindful when they want to listen to it, I just take it with a grain of salt :)

Christina Toth
Christina Toth

Country music all sounds the SAME. The ten mentioned could all be singing at different times but it all sounds exactly alike. I used to live country back in the late 80's/early 90's and older country before it because it was original! Now, it's the same crap over and over. Just because they're making money at it doesn't make it good, it just means people follow the pack until they get shunned on the internet and move on. There's so much better music out there.

Jake Moore
Jake Moore

Also Luke Bryan blows god bless amen

Jake Moore
Jake Moore

I'm more appalled by the mention of a fedora as a fashion statement.

Robert Michael
Robert Michael

Luke bryan definitely #1 on my list. dude can't even make "good" music

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