The 11 Most Confusing Christmas Albums of the Past Decade

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Metal God Entertainment
We found so many weird Christmas records that the Judas Priest frontman's holiday album didn't even make the list.
By Josh Chesler

Every year, new artists try their hands at making Christmas albums. It works for some (Mariah Carey, Michael Bublé), but for many others, it's just a weird experiment.

It's more or less expected for a lot of country singers and mainstream pop stars to make at least some kind of holiday offering, but there are plenty of musicians and bands who do so even though it doesn't seem to fit the general theme of their music. Here's our list of eleven Christmas albums from artists who we think have no business making Christmas albums.

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The 30 Highest-Paid Musicians In 2014

Categories: List-O-Rama

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Photo by Sayre Berman
Miley is smiley 'cause she made $36 million in the last 365 days.

Glitz. Glamour. And obscene, seven-figure weekly paychecks.

Such is the life of the rich and famous pop tarts, rock stars, rappers, and superstar DJs who enrich our lives with their inspiring music, spectacular tours, semi-nude Instapics, and endless drug-taking, DUI-ing, sex tape-ing antics.

Can you imagine making $100,000 a day? Well, even the poorest among Forbes' highest-paid musicians of 2014, like Miley Cyrus and Lady Gaga, pull down that many greenbacks every 24 hours.

Others, meanwhile, mint that much moola in 60 minutes. All day. All night. All year.

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Jeopardy's Five Best Musical Moments

Categories: List-O-Rama

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Super Soaker? Nah, that can't be it.
Jeopardy has a long and rich history of taking stuff that's cool and sexy and For The Kids and making it sound extraordinarily awkward and sanitized and, rather ironically, really damn stupid. With that simple premise in mind, here are some of our favorite musical moments from the show's history.

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Five Reasons This Club Sucks

Categories: List-O-Rama

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Photo by Christopher Victorio
Sign a club sucks: You walk into a room filled with candy eaters.

No one wants to waste their Saturdays on shitty drinks in shitty environments. And there's nothing fun about wasting hundreds of dollars on a night that you'd rather forget.

So here are five signs this club sucks. If three or more of these triggers are set off by the party spot that your best friend just suggested, don't drop a dollar on a cover charge.

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25 St. Louis Area Bars Open on Thanksgiving

Categories: List-O-Rama

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Mabel Suen
Atomic Cowboy
With Thanksgiving almost upon us, it's time to prepare yourself for over-drinking uncles, over-affectionate grandmas, and over-achieving siblings. Luckily for you, there's something we can all be thankful for: this handful of St. Louis bars that will be opening their doors on the evening of Thanksgiving.

So, whether you're celebrating the success of your Thanksgiving spread, needing a break from your well-meaning but clueless relatives, or just skipping the whole thing in lieu of a liquid Friendsgiving feast, head out to one of these bars and take part in St. Louis's favorite holiday (or pretty much anytime) tradition -- getting drunk.

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The 100 Greatest St. Louis Songs

Categories: List-O-Rama

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Illustration by Fred Harper
This is the story of St. Louis, as told by the musicians and artists who have glimpsed its complicated beauty.
By Roy Kasten, Christian Schaeffer and RFT Music

St. Louis isn't just a city. It's a song. Or rather songs, hundreds, thousands and more. Don't bother counting. We tried.

In back rooms and basements, on stages and streets, musicians have paid tribute to St. Louis again and again. Place matters. St. Louis doesn't define artists like Chuck Berry or Scott Joplin or Nelly. On the contrary, those performers helped define the city by producing music that reflects its depth and variety. Their songs, and those of countless other musicians, tell the city's story and represent it to the world.

This is a list of 100 of the greatest songs about, for and of St. Louis. It's not a roundup of our greatest musicians (though many are here), nor is it a catalog of influential tunes (though they're here, too), or a compendium of songs that namedrop St. Louis. Rather, this is a list about what it means to invoke St. Louis in song.

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7 People You Might Meet at a Guitar Store

Categories: List-O-Rama

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Photo by H. Michael Karshis
Fact: All American guitars made before 1968 are magical and were blessed by wizards. Paying $25,000 for one makes total sense when viewed in that light.
Any guitar player will occasionally venture into a guitar shop or musical-supply store that specializes in guitars. They can be wonderlands to anyone who likes to play guitar and wants to see firsthand what kind of gear is available. Like a comic-book store is a playground for comic fans, a guitar shop is a similar experience for guitar players.

But these paradises of gear-lust are also weird environments with their own social order and rules of conduct. There are also quite a few characters you're likely to encounter if you spend much time there. Some of them are fun people to be around, and others will make you wonder if they have a secret doll-themed torture room in their homes. Proceed carefully.


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The Ten Most Underrated Guitarists in the History of Rock

Categories: List-O-Rama

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Asylum Records/Wikimedia Commons
Joni Mitchell: One of history's most underrated guitarists.
While traveling to Texas a few weeks ago, I could not stop listening to Mutiny on the Bay, the searing collection of '80s Dead Kennedys performances released in 2001; East Bay Ray, it occurred to me, is one of the most underrated guitarists in the history of rock.

To me, being underrated doesn't mean that a musician has missed out on accolades and commercial success. It means that, for whatever reason, millions of music lovers probably haven't been exposed to a certain musician's talents and thus haven't had the chance to enjoy him or her. So here -- up for potential enjoyment and probably heated discussion -- are ten guitarists I believe are history's most underrated.

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The 10 Best Band Names In St. Louis

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Press photo
Fister, definitely appearing on this list.
Coming up with a good name for your band is crucial. A rose by any other name may smell as sweet, but it's hard to imagine Coldplay becoming the vanilla-rock powerhouse it is today as Pectoralz. That said, if one of the world's most famous bands started out with a name that godawful, then there's hope for us all, right?

While the rest of us are still scratching our heads and naming our bands after misspelled foods, these ten St. Louis acts have succeeded in crafting memorable monikers that are well suited to their musical endeavors.

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A Salute to the Supporting Cast of Run the Jewels 2

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Screenshot from "Run the Jewels" video.
That guy in the back, with the RAP FAN hat? He used to be a St. Louis hip-hop mainstay.
By Phillip Mlynar

By now, you've had a few weeks to play El-P and Killer Mike's magnificent Run the Jewels 2 on repeat. (If not, quietly chastise yourself and then head over here and download it now.) While the chemistry between Mike and El is an undeniable draw, the Run the Jewels movement has also bloomed into something of an ensemble project, with a coterie of behind-the-scenes cohorts also contributing to the album. Consider this a salute to the faithful jewel-running supporting cast.

See also: Meow the Jewels Reaches Kickstarter Goal, World Isn't So Bad After All

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