This Just In: Tony Banks Apparently Not a Douchebag, Local Sports Columnist Apparently Is
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You know what? This really sucks.
Tony Banks was on the radio yesterday, joining the Fast Lane on 101.1 ESPN, and unfortunately for me, he seems like a really nice guy. I say unfortunately because it's much harder to make fun of someone when they're a decent human being.
Tony was pleasant, funny, even humble. You couldn't come on and pull some sort of Terrell Owens kind of shit? Talk about how the fans were shitty, and Vermeil disrespected you, and how the ladies here weren't worth your time anyway? The guy didn't once refer to himself in the third person, for god's sake!
Banks even laughs at himself, laughs at the bad performances that he and his Rams teams put up while he was here in town. Now, he even works with a company that makes educational software to help kids stay in school!
Sigh. You know what? I don't even have the strength anymore. Are you happy, Tony? You've beaten me. I can't find anything else bad to say about you.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go crawl into a bottle of scotch.