Since Hill joined the team, I've been rooting for him to win the vacant fifth spot in the Cardinals' rotation. I've long admired his stuff, and the spectre of Kyle McClellan taking the mound every fifth day is just too terrifying for me to consider and still sleep well at night. So I've hoped against my logical self to see Hill turn his control issues around and regain some of the magic he showed back in the early days of his MLB career. 

Sadly, after watching Rich Hill this spring, I just don't think it's going to happen. 

First off, I wasn't aware Morgan Ensberg had a blog, but I'm all kinds of excited now to read it. And second, I had no idea anyone who played for the Astros could possibly be that intelligent. Hell, I'm honestly surprised any of their players can read. (Okay, before anyone gets all upset at me for calling the Houston players illiterate, I don't really mean that. I'm sure plenty of Astros players can read. Coloring books are still considered books, right?) 

Thus, you can imagine my feelings of discontent when this team not only failed to make anyone cry, but actually started out with a big fat ofer in the win column. In fact, not only was I discontented, I started feeling the familiar squeezing sensation I get every year when I suddenly realise the Cardinals probably aren't going to go 162-0 and have a run differential of +600. I started to panic. 

"What is wrong with this team?" I thought to myself. "How can a team with Matt Holliday and Albert Pujols and Chris Carpenter and Adam Wainwright possibly be this bad?" (Ignoring, of course, the fact none of those guys have actually seen much on-field time.) 

Fortunately for me and my peace of mind, these games don't count. They literally mean absolutely nothing. In fact, you could classify these games as nothing more than practice, if you wanted. And we all know how much practice matters, right? Hell, I'll let the recently-retired legend himself, Allen Iverson, tell you all about practice. 

Of course, the reality of spring training competitions then set in, and the whole thing suddenly became much, much less interesting. Garcia needs to have his workload monitored, so he'll start out in Memphis. Boggs is probably better in the bullpen (which I wholeheartedly agree with, but still), and Blake Hawksworth gave Dave Duncan the wam fuzzies last year working in relief. Both of them will either make the club out of the 'pen or not at all, it appears. So it's a two man race between Kyle "Duncan Loves Me" McClellan, aka K-Mac, aka Kylie MacNogue, aka Big Daddy French Toast, and Rich "Don't Call me Blass" Hill. Sure, they're probably the two best choices anyway, but it takes so much of the fun out of things. 

A bit of fifth starter numerical masturbation for your reading pleasure. 

Baseball is back. 

Sure, it was sloppy, ugly, and at times nearly unwatchable. Sure, the Cards got their asses handed to them, mostly by their own relief pitchers' inability to throw a ball over the plate. And sure, Albert didn't play and Holliday didn't play and Yadi didn't play and Evan MacLane got the start. So what? I sat down on my sofa, turned on the television, and there was a baseball game on. To me, that's more than enough cause for celebration. 

Thom Loverro, of ESPN 980 in Washington, D.C., is the author of the piece in question, which claims Tony La Russa is not worthy to go into the Hall of Fame because of the myriad steroid users he has coached over the years, as well as his claims of ignorance as to the situation. 

Sigh. You guys do know just how much it rankles me to defend Tony La Russa, don't you? 

Well, Rasmus Sr. is still around, posting his son's personal business all over internet forums. He goes by the handle of RCWarrior, and he just refuses to shut up. 

Two words: absolutely nothing. 

That's right. I have no new epiphanies to share with you this morning. I have no revelations, or lessons, or realizations, either. What? Seriously? You thought I would have something smart to say after one damn day of camp? You obviously have waaayyyy too high an opinion of me. 

Okay, fine. I'll come up with something. Just stop looking at me like that. Come on, Aaron, think. Think think think. Um, let's see...oh! I've got it! After one day of camp, it's already becoming clear the Cardinals' third base situation this year is eerily reminiscent of last year's. Yeah, I think I can turn that into a column. 

Walters, you may remember, is the soft-tossing changeup artist who made Alfonso Soriano look so very foolish last year, tossing slider after slider past the Cubs' slugger. Walters was also a darkhorse candidate to make the Cards' rotation this season out of spring training, as the club has no set fifth starter as of yet.