Canada's New Hockey Soundtrack

So I was looking around yesterday at all the teams still left in the NHL playoffs, and I have to admit to being more than a little shocked when I realized that there isn't a single Canadian team left in the hunt for Lord Stanley's Cup. 

In fact, not only was I shocked by the absence, I was pretty disappointed, as well. After all, hockey is Canada's national sport, and the only real contender for that title. It isn't like here in America, where the NFL, NBA, NASCAR, and Major League baseball are all huge, viable commercial draws. In Canada, you've got Hockey, then curling, and then a guy boxing a reindeer, bare-knuckled, naked, in the dead of the Canadian winter. (Although, apparently Canada is the world's biggest trampoline superpower. Who knew?) And yes, both the curling and the reindeer boxing are completely awesome, but when it comes down to it, they just don't bring out the fans the way that, say, men driving in a circle six hundred times does. 

So to see Canada so desperately underrepresented in the NHL playoffs is, to my mind, an absolute travesty. And after careful consideration, I think that I know what the problem is. 

Still, Most Evidence Suggests God Does, In Fact, Hate the Cubs

Spotted on New Florissant Road:

godhatesthecubs.jpg

Oh, if only the King of Kings could save us! Or, if not a king, then perhaps a Prince?

-Unreal

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